At the target center today I was in the bathroom and my phone went off. It was in my bag. My ringtone is The Price Of Beauty by Suicide Silence. The lady in the stall next to me says quite angrily “What the fuck is that noise???” I was trying so hard to not burst out laughing.

Some people can’t see their toes because they have a big tummy, some people can’t see their toes cos they’re pregnant.. I can’t see my toes cos I can’t see over my tits when I look down. Anyone else??

She asked me!!! We were talking then out of nowhere she said she had an important question for me, I said ask away. She said “will you go out with me?” I squeaked out a yes, and blushed for 20 minutes